For Now

So this is what it feels like
Up late into the night
I don't like the sounds
Your voice echoes in my mind

Your body is a haunting hourglass
Sand dripping in my head
An overwhelming feeling
of the road and where it should have lead

I would have loved you back
Given everything I had
I would have been your first
And your very last

Because you deserve the 3:00 am "I love you's"
And the fights that lead to love
You deserve an epic fantasy
With all of the above

But you turned and walked away
With everthing you had
You got up and packed the boxes
Leaving me so sad

And every day is torture
Seeing you is scarce
But when I see you, it's with her
For me there's no second glance

I'm reminded of the way you looked at me
The way you never look at her
I hope you see my pleading eyes that say
"I wanted to love you first"

But now I'm left with memories
Screaming in my head
When all I want is you beside me
Laying in my bed

One day you'll see that I love you
Maybe not tomorrow or the next
But for now I'll love you right
In the ways it should be meant